2 a.m. automatic?

Been so long, so hard to start

So that is how I start

Remember how to use the language

'Expletive deleted' it has been a while

....

new ways of using old ways

forget what's to be done

its done, in my mind at least

so close to completion I can taste the freedom

but as persistent as I can imagine

holding back some key element

no surprise

procrastination takes new forms every day

life a shape-shifting deamon from the depths of Hades or Hell

Wherever you think being would not be so swell

oh well

flailing thoughts about how to do

old forgotten friend sitting on my makeshift desk

two crimson bulls colliding inside my mind

...energy metaphor?

piece to pieces

I'm trying to play music

it's failing

only bounty commercials from Vevo to sooth my ears

...

excuse this hastily written article

by me

there is a little green man with three eyes and one antenna

he stares at me while I write, with a look that says 'oh no'

hands raised attempting to halt

a green army man is closer at hand

holding up the direction pad

for who knows what

'stop providing a way', he may say

tangent

...still no music

wth

there we go, Crystal Castles offering a courtship date

this seems to work

How oft I have thought of placing words back into digital cyberspace

so many lines, tracks of thought, well placed words meshing together

or so I seem to think

no one else can ever know

entertain this now, I think I will begin spoken words

not just yet

but future sense will be made by creating words not meant for the page

inspired in a way and then encouraged unknowingly to go further

my other is so convincing unwillingly

then - - - Vanished

in the dark we come out and play.

I made a paddle, it sits in the corner begging to play

still needs sanding, still needs oils, still needs love

such a needy paddle

of cherry and hawthorn...less the latter

gorgeous

paddle strokes to be made, longingly awaiting warmer waters

I must write what is more important

right now that is not this

it is there I must return,

this is the first, I must promise myself return

I am hungry for art, or whatever this is

...

Thanks

time to start again, roughly

So some solace please

music playing top forties good and bad

dont seem to understand

where this is all coming from

I can get lost inside of here

wandering wandering forever at a loss

what is the cost

for what will it continue

nothing in general

in general, generalizations are false

so they say

generally

we fail

we fall

we scrape our knees

laying in the dust the dirt and the grime

all for a little time

companion

and a -ship

no misplaced hyphens

...

a pause...

now twice for a track to set into

continue

an oft quoted ode

to a fork in the road

by a man named Frost

leaves me a choice

more travelled or less

go to do what has been done before

so everything

or turn away from it all

the norm

the right or righteous path

I say stray

yes

leave the maps behind

turn off the well beaten path

before there is ever the choice

to be the sheep or alpha wolf

a-type personality

what would you do?

ask a bee

where do you wander?

honey seems so free, the ultimate destruction

a complete intrusion

it's okay though

I will work my life to give you something for nothing

a wooden box you call a home could be nice

I digress...

so force the pause

...---...

call that what you will

distress

6 periods and three hyphens

ramble ramble rust and rancour

of what the above has become so far

tempted to read up but continue to write down

...

so please direct

to whom do I entertain

can I create intrigue here

is that what it's all about

only I know

so you can't tell me

and that is okay

I often feel forlorn

I like to write with words I like

I tend to try alliteration

not there

but below bares better basis

crumpling croutons crush careening carriages consistently containing cucumbers,

devilish demons dare delve deeper down dangerous development dredges,

even eternally emptied ears emit eager elves entirely ether ensconced,

but sense is hard to find

so I hear about how I ran into her heart

and then

a ding

it read

Aaaaaaaaaa eeeeeeeeeeeeeek

from her

I miss

time for a break

god loves exam time

so why don't you?

a dream and a list

I cant seem to sleep, but think of you

so awake I will stay,

for hope

will have me sleep by you

and in a dreamers sleep

with my arms wrapped tight

we'll see the world

...

A list of things in no particular order for no particular reason

- Menage a trois with a schizophrenic

- Bunjee Jump

- Skydive many more times

- Ski down a mountain I hiked up

- Eat ice cream in Naples

- Cliff dive

- Visit Angel Falls (maybe cliff jump there?)

- Paddle the Nahanni River

- Travel over an ocean

- Do a backflip

- See more than the 7 Wonders

- Obtain super power

- Make love in a canoe

- Jump out of a helicopter

- Climb a mountain (Big Wall Style)

- See the 'Burning Man'

- " " " 'Blue Man Group'

- Hike in a rainforest

- See Lava!

- See a cougar in the wild and live to tell about it...

- experience the power of nature forever

- and some more things

sitting here simply wishing

upon a porch with a view to the lake

staring into the east as the sun sets diamonds into the waters

they may last forever

etched in permanence

deeply ingrained

dreaming as though you were by my side

not so far off, but so far away

living a life of simplicity seems not so simple

oh well

listening to new songs

all the while wondering what you think

would you dance to this with me

I would count the minutes but it seems that they will be so many

so instead I count the moments

most have passed

some over a year since

but more I try to create, the what wills

one more time

I'm gonna sit here and think of you

wherever I am I wonder where you are too

I can't wait to hold your hand again

sitting on the side of a crag in the future

we will reach new heights

new found glory

a continuous story

the one of us

cover to cover

many pages to read

so many pages to write

I miss you all ways

so on

They had lights inside their eyes

and with this we search for the fruition of a thought

no less than a submission of a train of thought

as instead I would like to offer the free flow of non-verbal nonsense

How clearly can I see, what do I actually perceive

it's hard to know whats really going on

we look around us and see so many faces

so many minds

....

and this is mine

where does it go

wandering down alleys

more often hidden in the dark

its where I feel right

curled in the fetal position

laying here in wait

but for what

held onto this lingering feeling

something bigger has to happen

some major event

some occurrence that will never occur

I know how to live

made decisions and promises

to others and myself

yet keep only the former

rarely the latter

so often found sitting alone

a mind left to its own devices

so quickly looking to hide in the darkness

no looking at the light

mine is not so far, but just far enough

barely out of reach

together on beds and couches

down rivers and on lakes

and all for what

what is it that we are striving for

always so unsure

but only to myself

cant even picture some of the most basic of things

what it means

line for line

no form, no rhyme

no point

just a vent, blowing stale air

....

a break from reality has left me with less hope than prior to

The great escape

its just a bad day

looking for the way back home

for the great escape

so as a breath falls out

I say

bye bye

My Home

I can't seem to find the words

how to describe something so pure

a wilderness kept serene

As the sun shines through rolling clouds

finding holes in the white mountains above

lighting the horizon line

Islands of pine and spruce

Balsams on the shoreline

and glimmering amongst them all

standing with purity so tall

reflecting the suns rays

Birch trees in radiant grace

This is what I see every day

and I never tire of the natural beauty

This, my world

The Canadian Shield

The powerful pines standing tall

So much life everywhere I look

even the oldest, threatening to fall

fill with homes and sustenance

nothing here is wasted

not even a glance

...

Build me a home with walls of glass

Allow me to forever see outward

I never want to shield my eyes

Never let me hide

True Nature

This is it

hours before I go once again

A place I fell in love with at first stepping in

waters so pure

and trees of grace and history

ancient in their benevolence

holding true to all that we were

in nature with nurture

a love for whats real

how we have changed

sitting typing I barely fell

so many differences from us to them

masking evolution

an erosion of life

slowly removing all that exists

but this

and what is it

so I must continue down this path I have chosen

learn more , forget less

change can be made through voices oft heard

speak freely of feelings for what nature is

keep pages turning, one place to the next

the world your book is only asking your time

no more than that

its loose leaf and bound

in bindings and covers

pages blank awaiting stories and images for lore

so take to more reading, write what is true

our world is the one thing we cannot ignore

I offer this a phrase I once heard

We are often saying, as human beings,

how we have lost touch with nature.

Yet, in truth we are nature.

So, it is misconstrued what we are trying to say.

Nature is not what we have lost touch with.

We have lost touch with ourselves.

Our true nature.

Travel More, Sit Less

Read More, Watch Less

Explore Everything, Forget Nothing